Saddam Hussein?

Wow, they’ll pay you $800/time?

Is their bite strength 10x greater than other dogs? German Shepherds, Great Danes, etc are also big dogs used for guarding and police but you don’t hear about them snapping and killing a kid. There has to be more to it than just their potential for damage…

Like Freedom. I love my niece and nephew and enjoy spending time with them. But if I had to feed, clothe, clean up after, provide for, and entertain them 24 hours a day (not even considering when they were babies!)… I literally cannot imagine it.

Keep it up.

Eh, if you want. It’s a rental…

Are you threatening to nuke my home if I don’t!?

Yeah, I think this was just a hard sell, and it works. My friend and I were apartment shopping and had already checked out a few places. Then we arrived to look at another complex and after meeting with them, we said we’d let them know if we’d like to move forward. They were very friendly, but pushy, saying “no, you don’t have to do that”, “you’re moving in here!”, that kind of stuff. Being naive and lazy, we just said okay and took the path of least resistance. Oh well, gotta live somewhere!

They wouldn’t shut up about their “awesome, super-hard wood”.

Yeah, I’m not doing that.

The worst part is I can’t help but read all your comments in his voice now. That’s on you…

Not blaming anyone specifically because I obviously don’t have enough information to make an informed decision, but there were definitely some communication issues with the people surrounding you at that time… Regardless, I hope your other birthdays have been about 1000% better!

Oh wow, that’s horrible. I’m so sorry you had to endure that…

They say that the best revenge is living well so whether that resonates with you or not… I wish you the best life you can possibly have!

Well folks, this guy’s definitely Seth Rogan.

“you know, the hairier one”

The best (IMO) fast food place by me isn’t exactly close. By the time I get home I have to nuke fries and burger. 🤷🏼‍♂️ Still didn’t have to cook or do dishes!

I hate… so much about the things that you choose to be.

Thank you. I’m not actually that old-school, but back in the day, the only directions that mattered were the changes. “Turn right on the dirt road, and follow it for about 35 miles. Turn right at the crazy magenta and black diner…”

I’m sorry, I wasn’t paying attention. What were you saying?

That’s… some different issues. I think your phone/vehicle/GPS might actually be haunted. Do you know of any exorcists?